Fro’ Tales: Blog feature

Hey y’all!

I have been under a rock for a minute and that’s going to change at the end of the month when school ends but I thought I’d share some pretty dopesome news.

I was feature on a hair blog!!! 😀 (I know eh! little ol’ me). Karina has an amazing natural hair blog and you should all check it out ^_^

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Are you woman enough?

Womanhood

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I’ve always found the title “woman” troubling. More so in my teens than now, nevertheless it is a concept I am still negotiating. I’ve always felt more like a girl, a girl has minimal responsibilities, a girl can do so much more than a woman can. A woman is tied to social expectations and must conform or she will be shamed. A girl could conform to social expectations but the most she would get for deviating from the norm is a cautioning word, likely from the women around her.

I simply could not understand why people were so quick to thrust that word “woman” on me, and I was even more confused about why some people were so eager to adopt it. Cotton ball boobs does not a woman make! It must be earned, I felt. I still do really. A thirteen year old no matter how mature she may look or act is a G-I-R-L! Maybe one or two people may differ but for the majority I say girl.

She is a girl because she has likely achieved little. A woman is accomplished and has much to be proud of. A girl does not have the burden of making tough decisions (except of course between which teen pop sensation would grace her wall next). A woman must make many difficult decisions and she does so with grace. A woman carries great responsibility and exudes confidence with every step.

Then of course there’s me, straddling this fence. Not quite a woman but slowly leaving the carefree ways of a girl behind. I’m not entirely sure I’m ready to be a woman though, its far too grand. I like these inbetweenities where I can watch both phases and simply exist outside of the trappings of either.

Now as I am not yet a woman I can not speak from experience on what it means but I have had plenty experience being a girl and maybe I am idealizing womanhood. I certainly blame all the women in my life for setting such high standards, however maybe I just don’t know the struggle. Maybe every woman is just a girl in high heels, playing a part for the world’s applause. Maybe this is what I am wobbling towards, greatly unsure but faking it till I make it.

All is well

‘Fro Tales: Curl parfait

Edible Conditioning 2

Girrrrrllll! Let me tell you! I’m officially in love with Greek yogurt

First of all, shout out to heramerpersandhim for suggesting this to me in my last post. She said; “I stopped using banana because it was too hard to rinse out. Even when I used the baby formula. I switched to full fat Greek yogurt and never looked back.” For this you the real MVP. I absolutely loved it.

I never thought I’d become a “Kitchen Natural” as I like to call them, so as I went to the grocery store to grab a small tub of Greek yogurt I was saying a silent prayer that it would work or I would have been very upset with myself. With no exact measurements, I mixed Greek yogurt, honey, coconut oil and a few drops of Argan oil. The first thing that stood out to me was that the consistency was smooth unlike my lumpy bumpy banana mix. Processed with VSCOcam with a5 preset

I started off with a week old twist out that was more than a little dry. I left the conditioner in for about 30 minutes and rinsed with hot water. Everything rinsed right out! I wasn’t too confident until I could see my hair for myself though. I partly imagined my hair looking dull for some reason. Anyhow I came out of the shower and BAM!  Soft shiny hair. Now I was really excited. Detangling was a breeze and I braided my hair into two cornrows as usual.Processed with VSCOcam with g3 preset

Normally I would have to do a twist out on my damp hair when I take the cornrows down to get a really delicious fro, but not this time. Instant gorgeousness the minute I let the braids loose. I just had to fluff and move it around to frame my face better.

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Overall I was very happy with my results. The only con that I can identify is that the softness was not the same as when I did the banana condition. It was definitely nothing to complain about but the banana seemed to give a lasting softness. That said, I love love love it 🙂

 

ps. I define a kitchen natural as someone who can operate their entire hair regimen out of their kitchen. Nothing wrong with it, I just never thought I’d be one 🙂

I think of my Country

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Reflecting on Nigeria

I couldn’t count the number of times I rolled my eyes while listening to this young man mouth off about the demerits of Nigeria. By the time he described Nigerians as narcissistic I had just about had it. In his opinion, Nigerians are always quick to remind the world that we’re the “giants of Africa” but what do we have to be proud of? The smug look on his face spoke volumes to me. He was either trying to annoy somebody (eg. Me) or he honestly believed what he was saying and was daring the audience to disagree. I would not honor his desires then simply to spite him but I will speak my mind here.

As Nigerians we love to complain. Its a natural talent that we seem to possess. If we do well, we ask why didn’t we do better? If we fail, we ask why didn’t someone else stop us from failing. We complain about the corruption in our country like we invented corruption. We complain about our diversity like its the greatest curse. We would complain about anything as long as you give us the chance. What we fail to do however, after all this complaining is 1) look at what caused the problem  and 2)work to make it better.

Every time a Nigerian stands before me and tells me that we have no national identity all I see is a lack of understanding for where we as a country have come from. The country we now call Nigeria was a colonial construct that was set to ensure ease of colonial rule. The way Nigeria is set up was not for Nigerians to govern. It is a perfect representation of divide and rule because the people from one place to the next are so culturally different. It is hard to believe, with the sheer diversity of the nation that our people would mobilize to fight for independence; but we did. Our national identity should come in our shared history. We do not have to be Nigerian in the way that Americans are American to claim our national identity.

Every time a Nigerian suggests that secession of either the north or the south of Nigeria would solve all of our problems, I wonder how quickly we have forgotten the pain of the civil war. The lives of many people thrown in complete jeopardy because some people did what “seemed” to make the most sense. The north and the south of Nigeria have become very co-dependent irrespective of what some southern people might think. One would find it very difficult to survive without the other. The lives of civilians living in both parts would be horribly affected, and for what reason? Tribalism is our problem in the way some other countries have to deal with racism. As much as I hate to compare sites of inequity, I find this necessary in order to put things in context. Yes managing the power relations between multiple tribes is an incredibly difficult task but I don’t believe that it is impossible.

I am not naive. I know that there are many issues with Nigeria. I am often disappointed and frustrated with the people who lead us. I want more from and for the citizens. I expect so much from this country and it repeatedly falls below my expectations but I am not ashamed. I see potential in Nigeria. I am hopeful for a brighter day. Most importantly, I believe we have plenty to be proud of. There are Nigerians within the country and all over the world who are positively impacting the lives of millions. We are a resilient people who still find something to laugh about even in the darkest situations. We are smart, strong and we have such rich cultures. I don’t think that’s being narcissistic, it is choosing to acknowledge the positives when everyone insists on reminding you of the negatives.

picture by  willyverse

Little Red

   First shot at making a shift dress

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So as promised I’m here again with another post this week! I just might keep this up… Mightt

Anyhow a couple of weeks ago I saw  Ona’s DIY shift dress and I instantly fell in love! I messaged her immediately to send me a pattern for the dress but here’s the thing, I’m a teensy bit impatient when it comes to new projects so I started to research how to make a shift dress. I finally decided on what I wanted and went ahead.

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She sent me the pattern not long after, and while I don’t regret making the one I did I’m even more excited to give her’s a whirl! On another note, this was the first time the finished product actually looked just like my drawing!!! I guess this is a definite sign of progress so yayyy!

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This project however was not without hiccups. So since I was out of the country and away from my sewing machine for quite some time, Sally (my sewing machine) wasn’t quite moving like she ought to…okay to be perfectly honest, she wasn’t moving at all and I was freaking out!! In my panic I thought it might be a good idea to take my needle out but alas I clearly wasn’t focusing because I didn’t hold on to the needle and it fell into the bobbin part of my sewing machine (not sure what the real technical names are but basically the bottom half). My panic increased at this point because I wanted to get the needle out without breaking it seeing as I didn’t have a spare. Then I made yet another foolish decision and turned my machine upside down to get the needle out, this time it fell into the top part and that’s the last I have seen of that particular needle. That was when this happened..

sewing issues

You know that feeling you get when everything is going wrong and you keep thinking; “well could this possibly be any worse”? Yup that’s exactly how I felt.mini dress

Fast forward a few days later when I managed to get new needles, I finally cranked this baby out! This was also my first attempt at lining. I think I did a pretty decent job and I was thoroughly pleased with the finishing!! not a raw edge in sight.I added in a side zipper and a red border and tah dahhhh!!.

red dress

I’ve worn this out a number of times now and it’s so ridiculously comfortable:D I guess this is yet another post where all things worked together in the end. Also had a lot of fun taking pictures for this post! After an amazing lunch at Harlem Underground with my awesome sauce brother, we walked around taking pictures…perfect end to a rocky start.

harlem underground-begin

The Sunflower Blogger Award

Sunflower award- Inner workings of a color lover

Errmagashh I got nominated for the sunflower blogger award guys!!!!!!! Thank you Detuke for thinking of me :D. The rules are fairly simple;

Share 11 facts about yourself

Answer the questions set by the blogger who nominated you

nominate 11 bloggers

set 7 questions for the nominated bloggers

I’ve recently moved and started school so it’s taken me a little while to get this post up but regular posting should resume shortly 🙂 and since I haven’t posted in a while expect something on Wednesday too!!! Amazing eh? Okay lets get into it. Brace yourselves, its about to be a long one.

11 Facts about me;

1. I’m the last child in my family

2. This “facts about me” portion is making me uncomfortable cause I feel like I don’t “know” me all of a sudden

3. I’m Nigerian, from Akwa Ibom to be specific and no this doesn’t mean I’m ibo. (Its funny how often I actually have to explain this).

4. I’m in my fourth year in University

5. I looooove arguing about social issues. It literally gives me a rush

6. I also love me some candyyy

7. I’m an introvert but I have my extroverted moments

8. I’m an arts and crafts lover. If I can make it, paint it, weave it, glue it or draw it I’m good. (This is also where my whole color lover thing comes in)

9. I love to read

10. I consider myself to be a pretty cheerful person

11. I love plays and I’ve written a couple myself 🙂

Questions Set for Me;

If you could represent any brand, which one would you choose and why?

Okay this is a tough one. I feel that all brands have their weaknesses but if I absolutely had to choose, I would say either Kelloggs or Toms. Kelloggs because its a nostalgic brand for me and if all the things on the back of the cereal boxes are true, they have a real commitment to effecting social and environmental change. I would say Toms because its a social enterprise. Basically a true commitment of a company to improving the lives of other people matters most to me.

What is one interesting thing you’ve learned from reading my blog?

I find the style posts amazing. and I’ve found out about a few fashion-oriented businesses through you so that’s awesome sauce!

Do you have a phobia?

YESSSSS!! HEIGHTS AND WATER!!! Both make me feel like I’m about to die. I may or may not have embarrassing stories regarding crying on a wonderland ride…maybe I do, maybe I don’t.

If you were offered an all-expenses paid trip to anywhere in the world, where would you go and why?

I would go to Italy. My only reason is that one of my favorite professors is Italian and he makes such a huge fuss about how amazing and beautiful Italy is so I would love to go just for the experience (on somebody else’s dime though)

What is something you’ve achieved that you’re most proud of?

Teaching myself to sew is something that I’m pretty proud of. Also, writing and directing my own plays would have to be way up there on my proud scale.

What is your dream job/career

I would like to work in an international organization and create policies that positively impact the lives of women and children in the global south.

Favorite post on Tuke’s Quest

I really liked your natural hair journey post. Firstly because I love reading natural hair stories and I also thought it was very story-like or to be a teeny bit bougie “it had great narrative flow”.

7 Questions I Set

1. What country are you in?

2. What inspired you to start blogging?

3. How would you describe your style?

4. What’s is your earliest memory?

5. What would you change about the world if you could?

6. What are your top three blogs?

7. What is your favorite post on my blog?

 

Yayyy Nomination time!

1. Afrolems

2. The Simple Sophisticate

3. 1Qfoodplatter

4. Vanille noire

5. How do you solve a problem like…

6. Black is my logo

7. Okay I don’t know who else to tag 😦

See you on Wednesday!!